January 20, 2006

What in God's name am I doing awake at 6am? I've been awake for over an hour. I know that I went to sleep after midnight with all of the lights on, listening to music in my jammies and a robe. But I am up now? I'm gonna narc out in the middle of the lunch shift tomorrow, or while I'm hostessing. I have a really long shift tomorrow 10am-8pm at least. I'd like to call it a double, but I know the boss won't show up early enough for me to get a break. I was supposed to have the schedule done yesterday. Maybe my guilt is keeping me up? Worry for Sara? Excitement about Faux Pas? Staying out til 6am yesterday? Maybe I've finally become one of those people (who I despise, and don't want to be) who have to get up in the middle of the night to smoke.

Have I finally attained the perfect diurnal sleep schedule?

Am I just having problems sleeping alone?

I'm having a few "alone" problems now. My Dad is out of town, Sara in the hospital now, but before her headache she was always out, or on her way. Everyday I would swear I was going to stay home, clean do laundry, play with Emma, etc. Before I'd get into my driveway I would have something lined up, someone coming over, plans for something. Tonight I didn't. I put myself in an internet coma. I read The Time Traveler's Wife, by Audrey Niffenegger. Which I am having a little trouble getting into. I think that is only because the time-line is a little strange.

Now I am up and I am realizing I need to do the schedule, and that I need to find someplace to sleep this weekend if I go to Dallas on Saturday to get Faux Pas, and decide to stay the night.

One sleep problem to another.

Goodnight.

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