My Mother Taught Me To Fear Men

I know that she meant well. I believe that she wanted to make me wary of the men who might prey on me, and she wanted my fearlessness to appear impenetrable to them.
 
This has had several effects:

• I meet guys wherever the agreed place is so that I have my own car to be safe in. I am afraid to spend time alone with new men. I only give the guy my cell phone number so that he cannot find my address. I have a feeling that all men are out to deceive me.
• IF I ignore what feels like gut instinct and go hang out in the dorm of a guy in a class of mine, or if I let a guy ride along with me because he doesn't have a car I feel guilty about it, and nervous enough to sweat.
• Even when I am dating someone it takes me a very long time to feel comfortable with them, and to get over the idea that they have some sort of motive to take advantage of me.

This is not all my mother's fault, but I realized what  big part it plays the other day when I went to go out with a new friend of mine and she said, "Well, make sure you take your own car. You should have him follow you there." My friend was visiting family and didn't have his own car here so I broke the rules and spent the whole trip to the restaurant thinking of ways I could try and escape if necessary.

Just another reason to feel like a total nut.